What do I really want?

Sometimes, I really wonder, is it really worth going through the pain, humiliation and waiting? What is true love?

I've been thinking about it for a very long time. Many people say that love is blind and I believe that this saying is true.

What can I do about it? Is it worth the wait? I am trying to keep this thinking positive, but how long more can I be positive? Patience is virtue? The slow and focused wins the race?

Well, I do hope, time will give me an answer. Will there be any other one that will step into my life? There is so many obstacles that is going to be up ahead of me. How long more can I go through this?

Why?

I don't get it, time after time, we argue again over the silly things. On my end, I showed so much love to her and even did my best to keep her company. After keeping her company, she said she is bored of me. What does she want from me?

Life is so unfair, when she show special treatment to him. What about me? What am I to you? She said I made her wait so that we can talk. Then what about now? I am waiting close to 2 hours to vid call with you. I am so darn confused. What am I suppose to do?

Sometimes, I really really wonder, is it worth it? After doing so much for her, and she said such stuff to me?

Will we be together in the end? I really wonder. Will she even open her eyes and see the truth? How can you say that he is a good man? You must be joking and blinded. I don't know how much more I can take this pain.

Again

Yesterday, I sent her to the airport. It was rather a mixed feeling. Before she left for the airport, she cried telling me about her situation.

She still thinks that he is a good man. All I can say is that, love is really blind. After he hurt you so many times, and you can say he is a good man. Its so frustrating. When will she open her eyes and her eyes and see the truth?

I seriously don't know, how long more I can wait. Will it be forever? It really hurts so much to see this.