Life's bitterness

Deep down in my heart, I feels like this "TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!" Been down on luck lately. First, I failed my driving once again. And this is gonna make me spend more money again. Next, I checked my posting and I dodn't get into OCS. I got into SISPEC instead. My 2 buddies got in, but I didn't. Why? There are some ppl who got into OCS and I honestly feel that they don't deserve it. Why is life so unfair? These has been happening to me for a few years. Been down on luck and all. I hate this feeling, something that you wanted but you didn't achieve it at all. I even feel, that when you help one another, you're not appreciated for who you are. Does it help to be kind? THIS IS FUCKED UP!